gas lighting

The Missing Stair

tw: abuse, apathy, gas lighting   Missing stairs and leaders You all know someone who is a ‘missing stair’. It’s the person who gets handsy after a few drinks or the one who gets mean and abusive but doesn’t mean it. It’s the one that you know to avoid when they get like that and you warn other people about it but no one actually does anything about the problem person. The insidious part of it is that anyone who complains about that person gets victim-blamed that you should know known better (whether or not you actually knew it was […]

Definition of a thing

tw: discussion of sexual consent, gaslighting, rape culture Gaslighting gets tossed around a lot and you probably know what it is or have inferred it. Here is how I define it – you doubt your own lived experience to the point where you question reality and in more extreme cases, your sanity. It actually comes from a stage play that was made into a movie with Ingrid Bergman, if you want a popular culture touchpoint.  Often times a low harm version of gaslighting is practical jokes like changing out someone’s pants for a smaller or larger size to convince them […]